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When it's More than "Picky Eating"

November 07, 2019
By Dr. Ken Montfort
Picky Eating

Many parents have children who are picky about the foods they eat. However, some children seem to take this selectivity to an unusual or extreme level. When this happens, parents can become desperate and resort to strategies or techniques that they would never consider for other issues. Stockpiling fast food cheeseburgers or making multiple trips to the grocery store just to ensure that the “right” chicken nuggets are available may not be a parent’s ideal response to a picky eater, but many families have had to use these strategies just to keep their children eating.

"If you have a picky eater, it is likely that you have had at least one person say, 'If she gets hungry enough, she’ll eat!' The truth is that this 'traditional wisdom' that kids will eventually eat what is provided or repeatedly presenting the same food until the child eats it does not work for all children."

If you have a picky eater, it is likely that you have had at least one person say, “If she gets hungry enough, she’ll eat!” The truth is that this “traditional wisdom” that kids will eventually eat what is provided or repeatedly presenting the same food until the child eats it does not work for all children. This appears to be especially true for children with intense sensory needs, like those that often occur alongside autism. These families often feel trapped by their child’s picky eating, limiting the places they go or even the family trips they take due to concerns over whether they will be able to get their child to eat and/or the behavior they might use when their preferred foods are not available. When good, old-fashioned consequences, rewards, and bribery are ineffective at expanding a child’s food repertoire, specific intervention may be necessary.

What can you do to help expand your child’s palate? Many families find relief in sensory-based feeding intervention, such as the S.O.S. Approach to Feeding®. This approach draws on the expertise of psychologists, speech-language pathologists, occupational therapists, dieticians, and the medical community to provide an intervention that is Sequential, sensitive to the Oral-motor needs of each child and addresses the Sensory needs that are likely involved in a self-restricted diet. Typically implemented in a group setting, the S.O.S. Approach to Feeding® aims to change the ways that children learn to explore new foods by integrating play and positive experiences with the introduction of new foods. The Stewart Center is fortunate to have two professionals trained in this approach and offers groups for different ages, as well as individual sessions, if needed.

The holiday season provides a particularly challenging set of social expectations, especially when it comes to food and eating. Children are often asked to eat (or at least tolerate) foods that are unfamiliar to them. Loud and embarrassing refusals can ensue, leading to hurt feelings and even family conflict. Teaching children more socially acceptable ways to decline non-preferred foods is a good first step toward navigating these tricky situations. For example, in our “Picky Eaters” group, children are taught that brains need lots of information before making a decision, and that we avoid saying “I don’t like that” until our brains have collected enough of this information. Instead, we say “I’m still learning about that.” Not only is this less offensive to whomever prepared the food, but it also opens the door for playful interactions with the food as we continue to gather our important information.

However your family copes, we want everyone to know that picky eaters do not have to dictate your family’s choices, and that there are more options than simply accepting your new, limited experience.

If you would like to learn more, The Stewart Center offers family consultations, group or individual therapy sessions, or even just help troubleshooting or brainstorming. Call 713-973-1842 to find out more.